it's AMERICAN, I'm IDLE
13 Comments Published by Angel on Saturday, February 19, 2005 at 6:51:00 PM.
Last year, I caught the third season of American Idol...which Fantasia won, yes, Fantasia who said,"My lips are big, but my talent is bigger"..and that worked well for her!
I initially had the misconception that the show is about music,and yeah, about fifty percent of it is.But then there is the other fifty percent consisting of insult,tears, hyperventilation, surviving Simon, and perfecting the airbrushed 'image'.
So, if you have nothing else to do and you've not already written off reality TV as 'blah'(thanks to the after-taste of shows like 'My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance')...you will probably end up watching this show on the tube, the fourth season of which is currently on air.
In the prelim auditions,thousands of crooners(and *ahem* croakers)try to impress the judges so they can advance to the next level held at Hollywood.This stage of the competition proves the following points:
a) It takes a LOT of wrongs to make a right!!
b) Three fourths of the world's weirdos have shown up for these auditions.This involves an over-confident psychic, a youth-obsessed 44 year old, a girl who thinks she is the female version of Elvis, about a gazillion hip-hop wannabes...
All this gets responses from the judges such as:
Randy:"that was just aight for me,dawg."
Paula:"that was just wonderful, honey, it was beautiful...but we don't think we can put you through, but know that I love you and you have talent and..(goes on)" (what she means is "it's a NO")
Randy:"you would do well in Broadway"
Paula:"you are..err...different and unique."
Simon:"that.was.horrendous"
Simon:"you're not a very good psychic, are you?"
Simon:"do you have a day job?"
Simon,Randy and Paula:*uncontrollable laughter*
Simon:"you couldn't carry a tune if it was in a bucket!!"(I don't think he has ever said this, but can't you just imagine him saying it?!!)
Of course, heart-broken hopefuls rush out of the audition hall, hysterically yelling stuff like this into the camera:"I have seen the kind of people who have been selected, and I am WAY better than all of them"
"I have a voice and a dream and nothing's gonna stop me, not even Simon"
Even parents scream,"My son sounds just like Brian McKnight..."
"My daughter's a superstar.I know it"
My favourite moment was when Simon promised to give this guy fifty thousand dollars if, in the next six months, he brought out a #1 record.This guy accepted the challenge, quite arrogantly too.But somewhere you could hear a voice drowning out...that of Brandy, guest judge, saying "but err...what about William, he..err.."
Of course, she was referring to last year's most shocking contestant, William Hung, who made a fortune off his talent( the lack of it,actually).
So, these days, the show is at stage 2 where the better of the lot fight it out.This stage is safer for people with heart conditions.
Back home, there is the Indian counterpart 'Indian Idol'...which is almost nearing it's end.What is most unforgetful about this show:
1. Anu Malik's 'shero-shaayari' that amuses no one but him.He says weird stuff like:
"Tu hai Amit Sana,
tune gaaya aaj gaana,
Iodex lagaana"
Something like that...
2. Sonu Nigam's hair ...curly, forehead-hiding straight, forehead-showing straight..
phew!!
3.Farah Khan is of course, the desi Paula Abdul, who can never be mean.She compliments, saying,"you are looking glamourous today", "you look great in kurtas"...and other things that have nothing to do with music.
Thus,the idle watch the wannabe idols.... some make complete fools of themselves, while others actually end up making music.
That's it for now...it's Angel...out!!
I initially had the misconception that the show is about music,and yeah, about fifty percent of it is.But then there is the other fifty percent consisting of insult,tears, hyperventilation, surviving Simon, and perfecting the airbrushed 'image'.
So, if you have nothing else to do and you've not already written off reality TV as 'blah'(thanks to the after-taste of shows like 'My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance')...you will probably end up watching this show on the tube, the fourth season of which is currently on air.
In the prelim auditions,thousands of crooners(and *ahem* croakers)try to impress the judges so they can advance to the next level held at Hollywood.This stage of the competition proves the following points:
a) It takes a LOT of wrongs to make a right!!
b) Three fourths of the world's weirdos have shown up for these auditions.This involves an over-confident psychic, a youth-obsessed 44 year old, a girl who thinks she is the female version of Elvis, about a gazillion hip-hop wannabes...
All this gets responses from the judges such as:
Randy:"that was just aight for me,dawg."
Paula:"that was just wonderful, honey, it was beautiful...but we don't think we can put you through, but know that I love you and you have talent and..(goes on)" (what she means is "it's a NO")
Randy:"you would do well in Broadway"
Paula:"you are..err...different and unique."
Simon:"that.was.horrendous"
Simon:"you're not a very good psychic, are you?"
Simon:"do you have a day job?"
Simon,Randy and Paula:*uncontrollable laughter*
Simon:"you couldn't carry a tune if it was in a bucket!!"(I don't think he has ever said this, but can't you just imagine him saying it?!!)
Of course, heart-broken hopefuls rush out of the audition hall, hysterically yelling stuff like this into the camera:"I have seen the kind of people who have been selected, and I am WAY better than all of them"
"I have a voice and a dream and nothing's gonna stop me, not even Simon"
Even parents scream,"My son sounds just like Brian McKnight..."
"My daughter's a superstar.I know it"
My favourite moment was when Simon promised to give this guy fifty thousand dollars if, in the next six months, he brought out a #1 record.This guy accepted the challenge, quite arrogantly too.But somewhere you could hear a voice drowning out...that of Brandy, guest judge, saying "but err...what about William, he..err.."
Of course, she was referring to last year's most shocking contestant, William Hung, who made a fortune off his talent( the lack of it,actually).
So, these days, the show is at stage 2 where the better of the lot fight it out.This stage is safer for people with heart conditions.
Back home, there is the Indian counterpart 'Indian Idol'...which is almost nearing it's end.What is most unforgetful about this show:
1. Anu Malik's 'shero-shaayari' that amuses no one but him.He says weird stuff like:
"Tu hai Amit Sana,
tune gaaya aaj gaana,
Iodex lagaana"
Something like that...
2. Sonu Nigam's hair ...curly, forehead-hiding straight, forehead-showing straight..
phew!!
3.Farah Khan is of course, the desi Paula Abdul, who can never be mean.She compliments, saying,"you are looking glamourous today", "you look great in kurtas"...and other things that have nothing to do with music.
Thus,the idle watch the wannabe idols.... some make complete fools of themselves, while others actually end up making music.
That's it for now...it's Angel...out!!
[edit: the following post is meant to be taken light-heartedly.This is not a psychology paper or a list of expectations women have for men.I am in no way a sexist person, neither do I intend to generalize or portray men as being half-witted.If you enjoy gibberish, please read on!]
Yeah, I know.It's Valentine's day..."how's it going?", do I hear you enquire?
Doesn't the fact that I'm here reporting my views on my pathetic..err...unique lifestyle give you a slight hint??
OK, I do have a 'valentine'...my sister.Get back on your chair, reader...I have more to say.So, she was the first(and only) one to ask me..so I picked her.Anyways I'm waiting for her to come home...so we can go out or stay in...either way, spend some quality time yacking about everything from over-rated movies to conflicting doctrines.
Agreed, I am not the best person to advice guys on how to treat ladies nice...but is that going to stop me?? *an-all-knowing-grin*
So, you're a guy and you want to be a nice guy...probably even score with the ladies.I know some of you are saying,"not really".That's OK...you will read all the way through anyway...you know you want to.
1) Two-timing:
Take a deep breath. You can't 'see' two girls at once.Yeah, it's true...who knew?? Someone I know is in a dilemma right now coz he has two 'establishments' going...he thought he liked that one, now he likes this one...and can't tell that one that this one is in the picture...you get the drift, right?
And if your next question is,"well, what about 3??", look away, I'm not talking about you.
2)Commenting:
Repeat after me, "Think, then speak". Did you get that? Yeah, ALWAYS a plus.Rude comments are funny only to the guy uttering them. Women don't like to be told that their make-up doesn't suit them...(ex:If she is wearing dark lipstick, you DON'T ask her if she kissed a coal-miner.A HUGE no-no).
Yeah, so psychologists have shown that a guy expresses his fondness for a girl by pulling her hair and making crude remarks about her...but research a little more and you will find they were talking about guys below age 12.
And if you're asking,"So, I can't tell her she looks like a pumpkin when she wears her Orange sweater?".NO."what if it's a really cute pumpkin I'm referring to?".
Did I mention that dimwit questions are a turn-off?
3)Chivalry:
OK dudes,first off,
chiv·al·ry
1. The qualities idealized by knighthood, such as bravery, courtesy, honor, and gallantry toward women.
2. A manifestation of any of these qualities.
Call me crazy, but a good chunk of senoritas like to have doors opened for them.Some of them might deny it, even, but the fact remains.
So, am I asking you to stand up everytime she goes to the ladies' room and raise your hat when you say hello??("but I don't have a hat", "what does ladies' room mean??".At this point I am choosing to ignore people asking these questions, as, clearly they are not the target audience)
Well, not if you don't want to...but just saying the good old 'thank you' and 'please' have become rarities.If you can change that, you should.
4)Listen.Talk:
There is a difference between someone who says "how are you doing?"(or nowadays, the minimal "'sup?") and actually waits for you to answer and someone who doesn't.
Increase your range of interests and your vocabulary, because quite frankly, EVERYONE doesn't like the phrase "RAW IS WAR" and after a while, 'cool', 'hot' and 'whatever' just don't cut it.
5)Be nice to everyone:
I have noticed quite a few times that guys treat that one special girl very well and other people, guys and girls alike, are just blurry shapes to them.
Yeah, it is understandable that he might want to treat her extra-special...but not at the cost of losing out on his existing friendships by cutting them off totally.
Am I saying that guys should treat girls like princesses?? Well, yes!(check the name of this blog!*giggle*edit:this blog was formerly 'The Princess Diaries").But can girls treat guys really badly? Of course not...
My purpose for writing this is to let guys know that there are certain things that are a real turn-off.If this applies to you, good.If it doesn't, you are obviously in denial...ok ok I'm joking.
I guess this means I can't use this as a signature:
'Boys are like lava lamps: fun to look at but not so bright.'
Yeah, I know.It's Valentine's day..."how's it going?", do I hear you enquire?
Doesn't the fact that I'm here reporting my views on my pathetic..err...unique lifestyle give you a slight hint??
OK, I do have a 'valentine'...my sister.Get back on your chair, reader...I have more to say.So, she was the first(and only) one to ask me..so I picked her.Anyways I'm waiting for her to come home...so we can go out or stay in...either way, spend some quality time yacking about everything from over-rated movies to conflicting doctrines.
Agreed, I am not the best person to advice guys on how to treat ladies nice...but is that going to stop me?? *an-all-knowing-grin*
So, you're a guy and you want to be a nice guy...probably even score with the ladies.I know some of you are saying,"not really".That's OK...you will read all the way through anyway...you know you want to.
1) Two-timing:
Take a deep breath. You can't 'see' two girls at once.Yeah, it's true...who knew?? Someone I know is in a dilemma right now coz he has two 'establishments' going...he thought he liked that one, now he likes this one...and can't tell that one that this one is in the picture...you get the drift, right?
And if your next question is,"well, what about 3??", look away, I'm not talking about you.
2)Commenting:
Repeat after me, "Think, then speak". Did you get that? Yeah, ALWAYS a plus.Rude comments are funny only to the guy uttering them. Women don't like to be told that their make-up doesn't suit them...(ex:If she is wearing dark lipstick, you DON'T ask her if she kissed a coal-miner.A HUGE no-no).
Yeah, so psychologists have shown that a guy expresses his fondness for a girl by pulling her hair and making crude remarks about her...but research a little more and you will find they were talking about guys below age 12.
And if you're asking,"So, I can't tell her she looks like a pumpkin when she wears her Orange sweater?".NO."what if it's a really cute pumpkin I'm referring to?".
Did I mention that dimwit questions are a turn-off?
3)Chivalry:
OK dudes,first off,
chiv·al·ry
1. The qualities idealized by knighthood, such as bravery, courtesy, honor, and gallantry toward women.
2. A manifestation of any of these qualities.
Call me crazy, but a good chunk of senoritas like to have doors opened for them.Some of them might deny it, even, but the fact remains.
So, am I asking you to stand up everytime she goes to the ladies' room and raise your hat when you say hello??("but I don't have a hat", "what does ladies' room mean??".At this point I am choosing to ignore people asking these questions, as, clearly they are not the target audience)
Well, not if you don't want to...but just saying the good old 'thank you' and 'please' have become rarities.If you can change that, you should.
4)Listen.Talk:
There is a difference between someone who says "how are you doing?"(or nowadays, the minimal "'sup?") and actually waits for you to answer and someone who doesn't.
Increase your range of interests and your vocabulary, because quite frankly, EVERYONE doesn't like the phrase "RAW IS WAR" and after a while, 'cool', 'hot' and 'whatever' just don't cut it.
5)Be nice to everyone:
I have noticed quite a few times that guys treat that one special girl very well and other people, guys and girls alike, are just blurry shapes to them.
Yeah, it is understandable that he might want to treat her extra-special...but not at the cost of losing out on his existing friendships by cutting them off totally.
Am I saying that guys should treat girls like princesses?? Well, yes!(check the name of this blog!*giggle*edit:this blog was formerly 'The Princess Diaries").But can girls treat guys really badly? Of course not...
My purpose for writing this is to let guys know that there are certain things that are a real turn-off.If this applies to you, good.If it doesn't, you are obviously in denial...ok ok I'm joking.
I guess this means I can't use this as a signature:
'Boys are like lava lamps: fun to look at but not so bright.'
I've been resisting the temptation to add SO much more to the list below...but I'm sure if I really bring everything out in the open..I'd be at the risk of having a rep like that crazy cat lady who shoos away the kids playing in her garden...
just-have-to-say stuff:
1 'welcome to my life' by Simple Plan is quite a nice song, lyrically and otherwise.Maroon 5's 'sunday mornings' has a fresh catchy tune that stays in your head.'penny and me' by Hanson is simply brilliant.I didn't give a chance to these bands before...not bad, all of them.
2. There are more voice hunt shows on TV than there are ideas in my head for an interesting blog right now.
3. Travelling adds to your personality...especially if you're anything like me.I went nuts looking at the India Gate for the first time, patriotic sentiments flooded my being...till those guys next to me started cracking jokes about how I didn't know to take a decent picture.I handled that with a mental "whatever!". I can only imagine what will happen to me if I ever see the pyramids...hope paramedics will be standing by...and Victoria Falls will probably kill me!
4. Over-used terms are so...over used!Like 'metrosexual' and 'page 3'.Guys learn to comb their hair and they become metrosexual?Aren't they supposed to take care of themselves...I guess metrosexual really means 'civilised'(no offence, fellas!)
5. I will have an aversion for cellphones till of course I get one!...I've always said "no one needs to be available all the time".My sis, for one hasn't been the same since she got hers...which was gifted to her(not ME) by my cousin(hence intensifying the existing hatred for the gadget)
It is absolutely a menace hearing a phone ring in a theatre or in church(once at church, the pastor said "keep your phones on only if God is going to call")
And there are times I am having these meaningful conversations with someone and their phone rings...it's really difficult to get back to the conversation after that.Also, when someone listens to you and reads a message at the same time..it is SO annoying!
The worst part is getting a message at midnight saying,"just thought I would say good night"this accompanied by some kind of art made up of special characters.
And what's with multitasking mobile phones that take pictures, videos, check mail, do your laundry, wash your dishes, polish your shoes.....
hmmm I think when people say that I have an opinion about everything...they might be right(just a tad!).
just-have-to-say stuff:
1 'welcome to my life' by Simple Plan is quite a nice song, lyrically and otherwise.Maroon 5's 'sunday mornings' has a fresh catchy tune that stays in your head.'penny and me' by Hanson is simply brilliant.I didn't give a chance to these bands before...not bad, all of them.
2. There are more voice hunt shows on TV than there are ideas in my head for an interesting blog right now.
3. Travelling adds to your personality...especially if you're anything like me.I went nuts looking at the India Gate for the first time, patriotic sentiments flooded my being...till those guys next to me started cracking jokes about how I didn't know to take a decent picture.I handled that with a mental "whatever!". I can only imagine what will happen to me if I ever see the pyramids...hope paramedics will be standing by...and Victoria Falls will probably kill me!
4. Over-used terms are so...over used!Like 'metrosexual' and 'page 3'.Guys learn to comb their hair and they become metrosexual?Aren't they supposed to take care of themselves...I guess metrosexual really means 'civilised'(no offence, fellas!)
5. I will have an aversion for cellphones till of course I get one!...I've always said "no one needs to be available all the time".My sis, for one hasn't been the same since she got hers...which was gifted to her(not ME) by my cousin(hence intensifying the existing hatred for the gadget)
It is absolutely a menace hearing a phone ring in a theatre or in church(once at church, the pastor said "keep your phones on only if God is going to call")
And there are times I am having these meaningful conversations with someone and their phone rings...it's really difficult to get back to the conversation after that.Also, when someone listens to you and reads a message at the same time..it is SO annoying!
The worst part is getting a message at midnight saying,"just thought I would say good night"this accompanied by some kind of art made up of special characters.
And what's with multitasking mobile phones that take pictures, videos, check mail, do your laundry, wash your dishes, polish your shoes.....
hmmm I think when people say that I have an opinion about everything...they might be right(just a tad!).
